Wednesday, November 03, 2004

So dissapointed/ At first I put it all up to luck/ God knows why my country don't give a fuck...

What the hell is going on?

This country's being taken over by the aggressively arrogant, on the full throated support of the aggressively mediocre (The Official Fan Club of the Status Quo©). So I give up. This is your America, the land of housing developments of scientific sameness, with names like "The Mews" and "Little Brook Run", that are uncluttered by stupid shit like trees. I'm going to move there! I'm going to buy a Dodge pick-up because the commercials tell me I'm a pussy if I don't! I'm down, you win!

Oprah's Book Club? Yes. Shirts that advertise where I bought the shirt? Absolutely. Olive Garden? You better goddamn believe it. I'll be there so many times, they'll ask me if I want "the usual." (Damn right I do, and that fucking salad bowl better be bottomless.) I am now down with NASCAR, white zinfindel, using "Can you hear me now? Good!" as a punchline, cubicles, middle management, books about angels being around us, poems by dying 12-year-olds, Toby Keith, strip malls, cell-phone walkie-talkies, shell necklaces, backwards baseball caps, US Weekly, Hallmark teddy bears, the romanticization of Las Vegas as a symbol of masculinity, and, of course, keeping the gays from getting married. Because why should I do otherwise? Anymore, I'm just a tourist here, and I may as well dress the part to fit in.


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