What says romance more than a Crooked Fingers valentines e-card? (Answer: nothing.) Merge Records has said that if sending this e-card does not get you sloppy for your hangdown (for the men) or a hot meat injection (for the ladies), Merge will give you the publishing rights to the entire Dinosaur Jr. catalog.<sup>*

*</sup>Merge never said this. Sorry to shatter your dream of selling "Freak Scene" to Radio Shack.