Toby Keith's opening a second restaurant? The man's in danger of stretching himself too thin. He's turning into just another Todd English, more obsessed with his celebrity and growing empire of restaurants then about the food. One day, someone's going to bite into his fried bologna sandwich, shake their head disappointedly, and say, "This was not made with love."

You can't just churn out restaurants, Toby. Would you just churn out song after song about America kicking ass? Of course not. You really have to feel like America is going to kick ass, then you put that feeling to music. If you just directed a laser culinary focus towards one restaurant, it could be, and I don't think I'm overstating it, the French Laundry of Oklahoma City. My only hope is that Kenny Rogers gets to you in time and warns you about the siren song of franchising and the rocky shores to which their sweet melodies lead.