Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I know that I've got issues, but you're pretty messed up too...

Speaking of lady singers for whom I'm in the tank, Kelly Clarkson's new single came out today and it sounds like Kelly's stump speech to become the grand marshall of the every gay pride parade in 2009.* So take that as you will, but I'm disappointed. It starts out so promising with a guitar line that recalls "Since U Been Gone" but then some bleating beats and subtle autotune come in. God, I hate autotune. That being said, I've already listened to it multiple times and I'll probably buy it on iTunes.

God, what song does that chorus sound like? It's driving me cuckoo clock.

*As a straight man prone to broad generalizations, I'm more than willing to concede that the gay community can teach my people many things on a variety of topics: fashion, interior design, margarita recipes, compassion, personal hygiene and fitness, bitchy comments, etc. Hell, if I'm not mistaken there's a whole basic-cable cottage industry based on this. But one thing I refuse to concede: music. Oh sweet lord that's a train wreck. Come on. Scissor Sisters? More like... um... Poop Sisters? Am I right? (Takes sip from martini, purses lips.)


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